Yes, just like the rats cut off from their junk food in those experiments, I really don't feel like eating at all. I'm in that unfortunate state of mind where if I have to choose between eating whole foods or nothing, I'll take the nothing. The rats and I are awfully short-sighted in this regard. I've had a couple of apples, some nuts and a raw cookie. I've had raw food with me all day, but everything tastes like cardboard right now. This is not good timing. You can see why I fall off the raw wagon all the time when... the plot thickens... tonight I have the distinct pleasure of sharing an office with leftover pizza and pastries. I hate this. Those darn rats would never have survived this. In one of the junk food experiments I mentioned in my Jekyll and Hyde post, the rats were zapped on the foot everytime they went for the junk. Guess what? They didn't care. They just accepted it. Rats probably aren't interested in their heart chakras turning, regaining their once thick hair or eliminating mucoid plaque from their intestines though either. I could be wrong. Maybe some are.
I've got a scratchy throat to boot, so I'll be making some cumin-lemon tea pureed with about five cloves of garlic when I get home. This knocks out any bug in a day or two, for me anyway. I swear by it. Breath of the dead, but it works. BTW, you can puree the garlic with anything, but I have no intention of giving up tea. It's Chicago, and winter is upon us. Let's get real.
Now I must confess to murder. I had to put three green smoothies out of their misery today - took them out behind the barn and shot them. Nah, I just flushed them... a little farm kid humor. I don't even have a barn. They'd sat abandoned in my fridge for about a week, and here I am complaining about my thinning hair. I know. Seaweed holds more appeal for me right now than any other greens. The nori from Karyn's was really good - can't wait to get some more. Looks like Karyn's might play a crucial role in getting me through these first few uber-challenging weeks.
What do you tell yourself when trapped alone with the worst of the worst junk foods during a time when everything else tastes like dryer lint? Pizza and donuts will be around forever. They're not going to stop making them. I'm just not going to partake today. I have too many things I want to accomplish and experience, and raw is the road I'm taking to reach it all. It's a road filled with lots of other great experiences I can't even imagine. It's worth it. I'm worth it... because I'm good enough, I'm smart enough and gosh darn it, people like me. If I'm going to go all self-helpy, I might as well channel Stuart Smalley while I'm at it.
In other news, my nephew awarded me 100 'bonus points' tonight for eating an apple while they ate McDonald's. I have no idea what I can use those points towards. I don't think they're like Marlboro Miles. I doubt there's a kayak in it for me, but I'm digging it. I want more points! It may amount to no more than a pat on the head for making a healthy choice, but dang it felt good and I deserved them. My other nephew gave me five points. What's up with that? Interesting to note the 100 points came from a natural-born raw foodist, a kid who's always running to the refrigerator, grabbing a cucumber, biting the ends off and spitting them in the sink, then running back to the clubhouse. The five points came from my little fellow junk food junkie, bless his heart.
HI I can so relate to your rat scenario. I discovered the joy of raw foods in 2008. I spent 6 months in total raw food happiness. I felt great and looked great too. Then I fell off the wagon, and I've been struggling to get a toe-hold back on every single day. I don't write this to discourage you, but instead so that you know how difficult struggling with this cooked-food addition can be. Best wishes to you, and know that someone else is struggling day by day also. But. . . it is well-worth the journey.
ReplyDeleteThanks Heidi! Isn't it strange how those first few weeks are so hard, but once you're past that it gets easier everyday... so easy you forget what a mess you were in before!? Serendipitous, you posting this today... tomorrow I start fresh, and I'm really looking forward to the clarity. I remember reading about Victoria Boutenko asking the director of one of the raw food centers how many people stick to it once they return home. He got all teray-eyed and told her about 2% and those are mostly people who had come to them because they were gravely, if not terminally, ill. For me, this puts a bit of perspective on just what a challenge raw can be. But then I see people like Matt & Angela Monarch, Dave the Raw Food Trucker and Dr. Ali and I want that experience. I have to experience that level of detoxification, clarity, peace and happiness. I have no doubt it's worth it and sooooooo much better than any stupid old cooked cookies or pizza lol. I KNOW I can do this. Thanks for your words of encouragement!
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